Happy Wednesday!!!
Hello, hello, hello, and happy Wednesday! It’s one of my favorite days of the week because of course, it’s garbage day over here. Today is also my orientation for my new job, so that will be interesting. Because of the virus, it will be through a Zoom meeting, so I won’t even have to leave the house. What a strange time we are living in!
I am kind of glad I am not leaving the house because I have been a little emotional over missing my Dad. I have visited his grave twice in the last few weeks, and seem to feel his presence more strongly. Since his mom passed away a few weeks ago, (my Grandma) I have been thinking about him even more. Since I have almost no contact with my other family members it can get quite lonely over here, being isolated in Idaho. That leads me to today’s poem…
Today’s Poem
Today’s poem is about my Dad. Last night I felt his presence so very strongly that it took me hours before I could get it together. I cried, which I almost never do anymore. I know it can be healthy to cry, but it’s not my thing and I don’t like my husband to see me cry either. It’s very rare, and he has barely ever seen me cry in the eight years we have been together.
This poem helped me release a little portion of what I was feeling. If you have ever lost a loved one you can relate to the heartache it brings. We never get over the pain, and it can hit us when we least expect it. Sometimes it is a constant ache that can even last for years. Either way, it is an awful agony to go through. Here we go with my poem for today…
I Felt You Here With Me
I felt you here with me
Almost like a dream
Yet I was fully awake
I dared not speak to you
In fear of making you disappear
My inner eyes beheld your radiance
Your smile comforted my soul
I felt your loving arms around me
Tears came to my eyes when I realized
That you were no more
Except a hope and a dream
Still, I knew I would see you again
Someday In our heavenly home
My anguish grew as I realized
No amount of compromise
Would bring you back to me
As I stood there staring at the stone in the ground
Wondering where you were now
Picturing your crooked smile and remembering
your last words to me, as you said, ”I’ll see you in a month, I love you.”
Well, I saw you sooner, but it was at your funeral
I cried so hard- we all did
As you lay there so still
Yet, I had total faith that you might wake up
And say it was just some sick joke
And that everything would be OK
But it was not OK
And it’s still not OK
And everything has been different ever since that terrible day
But life goes on without you anyway
For life and death are with us every day
And even as I miss you I know that you’re still with me
And when I feel you near me
I hope I can piece together just one more memory
It helps me to keep you alive within me
Until I see you again
I miss you Dad, and always will
I love you Dad, I’m crying now
And if you’re here and reading this now
I hope somehow I can make you proud
Remember that you are not alone. We are all in this together. If you ever need anyone to talk to, feel free to reach out to me. Everyone has their own worst story, and everyone has a right to their feelings about situations they have been through. Sometimes a listening ear can make all of the difference in this world full of sorrows.
Until next time, stay safe, and be blessed!
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