I know that I sure do!
Background
Anxiety is something that has plagued me since the recollection of my cognitive existence. Fear made itself a comfy home inside of my brain and body. I lived with the “what ifs” on a daily basis. I like to compare my mindset at the time with Charlie Brown. He was afraid of everything and so was I.
I wish I could say that fear didn’t dictate my actions as I grew older, but if anything, It got worse. In 2007, after getting bit by a tick, my world came crashing down around me. I think I had a mental breakdown, and suddenly I was afraid to go outside again and feared being indoors too.
It felt hopeless. My dogs would bring ticks into the house and get them in my bed. I’d wake up in the middle of the night to feel something crawling around on my head and was disgusted and terrified at the same time.
I wanted to move away so badly, but after trying to sell the house for a few months, we took it off the market., I resigned myself to stay in the house. Even though I was scared of being in it, I was less afraid than being outside.
It got to the point where I couldn’t even walk out onto my front porch. Every day, I isolated even more, and before I knew it, seven years had passed by, and I grew more isolated. I barely saw family and didn’t have any friends. Being lonely was a price I had to pay for not wanting to go outdoors. My condition lasted for seven years.
Seven years without barely leaving the house. Some days I wanted to scream. I remember almost hearing alarms go off in my head, and feeling a sense of doom. Fear had its ugly grip on me and I didn’t know how to get out of the cycle. Anxiety and fear made their home within my entire being.
During those trying times, I would read the Bible and try to make the verses I read become true for me. In desperation, I’d repeat the words, but nothing seemed to happen. I started to think that maybe God just didn’t want to help me. I began to question his goodness.
I also spent a great deal of time feeling guilty that I wasn’t serving him in some way. The most I could do for him at the time was pray for others, so that’s what I did. My guilt still hung over me like a wet cloak.
Fast-forwarding to eleven years later, and I’m still suffering from anxiety, but not to the same extent. Medication has been a godsend for me. It took a long time to find the right combination, but I’m glad that I stuck with it.
I still isolate a lot from the outside world, and suffer from social anxiety, along with generalized anxiety disorder. It can be debilitating at times and makes me feel inadequate as well as paralyzed within my own fear.
Something that can be very difficult is the guilt that comes with it, To top things all off, I have Bipolar Disorder 1, along with Borderline Personality Disorder, as well as Chronic PTSD. Sometimes I think it’s easier just to say what I don’t have, rather than rattle off the list of ailments I suffer with, 😉 But seriously, it can be a real drag to deal with mental illness, along with guilt following you around like an unwanted friend.
This leads me to the Bible, and what it says about anxiety and fear. There are so many helpful verses about this subject that you would think my mind would be transformed by now.
I think the problem for me, and possible for many others is that I don’t have enough self-disciple to guard my thoughts. If I could center my mind onto God’s word, I truly think that my anxiety could be a thing of the past.
I pray that I can do this, and pray the same for you if you too suffer from these conditions.
Here is a list of Bible verses that you might find helpful if you are a fearful person dealing with anxiety, like me, I hope they lift your spirit and calm your soul.
Isaiah 40:31
but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not be faint.
Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Psalm 34:4
I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.
Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jese our Lord.
My Favorite Verse of all time 🙂
Proverbs 3: 5-6
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
John 14:27
Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
I could go on and on because the Bible is full of verses about fear and anxiety. I don’t know about you, but I need more of God’s Word in my heart, so when the evil one comes to steal my joy, I am prepared with words of truth coming directly from God, himself.
I need to pray to be able to do this. I need to pray for more self-discipline so I can train my mind on the routes my thoughts travel to.
I think one thing I will do is get some nice craft paper, and write verses down on the pages, and then hang them up throughout the house. This way, a little at a time, I can get them etched into my mind.
How About You?
Do you struggle with fear and/or anxiety? If so, how do you manage it, or do you manage it at all? I know that with me, many times, anxiety took over and I couldn’t seem to stop it. The more I tried to make it go away, the worse I felt. Usually, though, these were times where I didn’t repeat any scripture in my head.
Now that I have a game plan to try and combat anxiety, I feel a little more peace within my soul. I know for sure that God doesn’t want me to be full of anxiety. I know that the enemy wants me to be miserable, and he has won many times. This time I will fight back- with prayer, praise, and God’s amazing Word.
Photo by Fuu J on Unsplash